Things are really hopping around our house lately as we prepare for Baby Schuette (pretty sure we’ll come up with a better name.) The reality of eventual parenthood is setting in and I couldn’t be happier. I know, I know; it’s going to hit me like a ton of Legos, but I’m still getting ready. I even have my diaper bag. After careful research, I chose the brown diaper bag from Diaperdude.com (Oh, for the love of God, make sure you type that address correctly!) It’s a comfortable, over-the-shoulder design and there’s even a pocket for my cell phone right on the strap! Oh, and it also holds baby-related stuff better than any other bag I looked at.
Patty has also given me permission to tell you that she is starting to show. In other words, if you were making a movie, and you needed to cast “Bubbly Pregnant Lady #1,” Patty is the one you would call. Of course, she’s not in the Screen Actors Guild, and she can’t really fly to L.A. right now, so we’d have work around that. I might be over-thinking this entire paragraph. My point is, Patty looks great…even when she doesn’t think so.
We’ve also tragically magically transformed my super secret 70’s/80’s lair into a slightly less-super secret baby room. My Mannequin movie poster has replaced by pictures of Teddy Bears, my copies of Dynamite Magazine have been supplanted by Dr. Seuss, and my Atari 2600 has been replaced by nothing…just, nothing, not even a freakin’ Playstation. The room has never looked better, though; even without the inspirational picture of Dolph Sweet.
Patty & I will be also be joining a new church very soon. And by “new church,” I mean, “church.” We’re not currently members of a particular church yet. To be honest, I learned most of what I know about religion from watching George Burns movies. According to Hollywood, God smokes cigars, has bad writers, and was a lot funnier in the 1940s. Seriously though, I know our family will benefit from it, and that’s good enough for me. Who knows, maybe they need a rockin’ church organist. I assume I could do that.
We’re also working on getting a new car to replace the aging Jeep Grand Cherokee. It’s becoming increasingly unreliable, and I’m fairly certain the transmission is being held together with duct tape and Gummi-Bears. It’s been a good vehicle, though. That Jeep got me home safely from every gig, every time. Since we have another mini-SUV to haul around the impending torrent of child-related accoutrements, we are going to replace the Jeep with a smaller sedan. Also, I’m not domestic enough, and I strongly believe a Ford Taurus can fix that. Perhaps beige? You kids love beige.
I’ll continue to let you know how the preparations are going. I’m pretty sure it’ll be uneventful.
